••• From a reader: “I’m the parent of a Spruce Street School student. Last night the school held a fundraiser on the school’s rooftop playground, which sits below the west side of the Gehry tower. Harry’s Italian donated excellent food, local wine merchants donated cases of vino, and someone renting one of the apartments above the party donated several brown eggs, which came splattering down on the parents. If the party was that noisy, wouldn’t a call to the doormen of the building to do something about it have been the easiest thing to do? Spruce Street School and the Gehry tower co-exist in the same building. I know a relationship exists between building management and school staff because they’ve had to meet and discuss the beer bottles another tenant (or the same?) previously rained down on the playground. What’s next? If recess gets too noisy should parents and school staff need to worry that someone is going to injure the kids? That behavior is disgusting. A doorman could have easily called the school to complain, or simply walked around the corner and said something to the security staff in the school lobby. People in this city are really gross.” It’s true! But they’re gross everywhere.

••• From the Department of Transportation: “The New York City Department of Transportation today announced the installation of a prototype for the agency’s first-ever outdoor art display case at TriBeCa’s Bogardus Plaza on Hudson Street between Chambers and Reade streets. The model, designed by Architecture Research Office, will be in place for one month to observe the design’s performance in an outdoor environment. Last fall, DOT issued a challenge to designers, asking them to reinvent the fixed display cases seen in museums and galleries as a moveable piece for outdoor use. ARO’s design was selected for implementation. The goal is to temporarily install display cases in pedestrian plazas and other areas within the public realm to create new opportunities for displaying art such as photos, paintings and collages.” Call me old-fashioned, but I think parks should be a respite from manmade visual stimulation.

••• From Manhattan Youth: “The Art Shack is a place where kids can get together for special art projects or to participate in the creation of  murals we are now making at Pier 25. The Mural Project is an on-going project and one day we hope to wrap the entire pier in children’s murals.” Let’s see if I can piss even more people off: I’m not sure how I feel about that last part, actually. Is kids’ art not best appreciated on the family’s fridge?

••• From a reader: “Janet Newman is opening a show of her very unique flower paintings [tonight] at the Sovereign Bank at corner of Franklin and Hudson, 5:30 to 8 p.m.”

••• Something called Delmonico’s Café wants to open at 300 Spring (between Hudson and Renwick, where Sora Lella used to be).

••• 481 Washington—just north of Canal—is being marketed as the Spice Warehouse (as if the real spice warehouse isn’t further south). No clue if this is new; I don’t walk up that part of Washington very often.

••• I remember how bummed I was when I realized I had lost the ability (and/or body type) to Hula Hoop—and Torly Kid’s video brings it all back.

••• Left: Another peek at Jean, the café/wine bar coming to W. Broadway between Warren and Murray, courtesy @MMDevoe.

••• An update from the Lilac Preservation Project: “The barque Picton Castle of Lunenberg, Nova Scotia is arriving at Pier 25 today and will visit through the weekend.  She will moor at the outermost berth on the north side of the pier. Arrival time is approximately 10 a.m.  I’m sorry about the late notice, but I wasn’t able to confirm her arrival until yesterday. Also, the Waterfront Museum on the barge Lehigh Valley #79 will be leaving Pier 25 today about 2 p.m. after 10 days of public events. The tug Pegasus will tow her back to Red Hook, Brooklyn and then return to her new home at Pier 25.”

••• There will be a free opera performance in Washington Market Park, sponsored by Downtown Symphony, Sunday at 3 p.m.

••• There’s a Burger King on Canal, near Broadway. You can tell how enthusiastic I am about this by the fact that I wouldn’t cross the street to take a photo. Anyway, I think it’s new.

••• May 19 is It’s My Park Day at Washington Market Park: “We use this day to teach children a bit about gardening, and enlist their help in planting thousands of bulbs in the fall and annuals in the spring.” It’s from 10 a.m. to 11 a.m. Rain date: May 20.

••• I emailed Dr. Michel Cohen to see when Jean, his restaurant at 65 W. Broadway, might open. The response: “Getting close to make a decision! You will be the first one to know.” And you’ll be second.

••• From @MMDevoe on Twitter: “French Cafe Gourmand just opened on 9 Maiden Lane in former Klatch site. Yay caffeine!”

••• From Notify NYC: “There will be a fireworks display near Liberty Island on 5/12/12, at approximately 11:30 p.m.”

••• The vendors for Saturday’s first-of-the-season Fulton Stall Market: Urban Rose, Mami Tere, Art by Naima Ruam Pizzevia, NY Farm 2 Door, Teaves Tea, Maupston Designs, Mighty Balls, The Poffertjes Man, Lorna’s Naturals, Maimi Sunii, Bugget Out and Bambino’s Ravioli.

••• I came across something club-like called L4 Black Door on Twitter; its website says “our humble little space is place for creativity, experimentation and serves as an artist in residence incubator or nurture joint” and that it’s at 41 Murray. That’s Eamonn’s, where downstairs is (was?) another club-like thing called Cin-M-Art Space. Or maybe the two entities are just nights at a rentable space? All of which is neither here nor there, except that while Googling I also came across this notice that Eamonn’s is for sale.

••• From the Waterfront Museum, currently docked at pier 25: “Free Barge Open Hours Thursday 4–8 p.m. and Sunday 1–5 p.m. And on Saturday at 1 p.m. and 4 p.m., there’s a performance by Billy Bones—The Good Pirate.”

••• From a reader who has long lamented the lack of good Chinese food: “Ordered in from Sunny One at 94 Chambers last night. First impression: a lot better than New China Red.”

••• Hula Hoopers, start practicing! Torly Kid‘s fourth-annual Tween Party and Hula Hoop Contest is May 12 from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Special events this year: Author Sarah Mlynowski will do a reading, and airbrush artist Mike Barile will be painting designs on free neon canvas bags.

••• George, the doorman at 11 Beach, is a nominee in a “hottest doorman” contest because of his singing.

••• From Kathleen at the Tribeca Greenmarket: “Starting this week, every Saturday from 8am to 1:30pm you’ll be able to drop off your used clothes and textiles, courtesy of Wearable Collections. We accept clean and dry clothing, paired shoes, bedding, linens, hats, handbags, belts, fabric scraps 36″ x 36″ or larger and other textiles. We do not accept rugs or carpeting. Also: Valley Shepherd returns this Saturday with their artisanal sheep cheeses, and from 10:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m., in honor of Earth Day, we’ll be teaching kids about plants while getting in the dirt doing some planting of our own.”

••• Jeffrey Roseman of Newmark Knight Frank Retail confirmed on Twitter than Chipotle is coming to Greenwich and Murray (where Twin Café was). Thanks to Avi at West Side Rag for forwarding the tweet.

••• Reminder #1 (about something I posted about a while back): The Long Tall Sally pop-up (with clothes for women of height) is going on through April 22 at 172 Duane). Says one reader: “For tall girls this brand is particularly good and prices are decent. Very good selection of jeans which as everyone knows are the hardest piece of clothing for women to fit.”

••• Reminder #2: The TOAST, a.k.a. the Tribeca Open Artists Studio Tour, is April 27–30. If you’ve never been, you really should check it out.

••• Press release: “Council Member Margaret Chin, Chair, Committee on Lower Manhattan Redevelopment, will join Council Member James Vacca, Chair, Committee on Transportation, for an oversight hearing on the issue of construction coordination in Lower Manhattan.” April 23, 1:30 p.m., 250 Broadway, 14th floor.

••• From the Lower Manhattan Construction Command Center (I had been wondering what was going on in there): “Work is now underway at 50 Varick Street, where the existing seven-story commercial building is being renovated. Located on the east side of Varick Street between Beach and Laight Streets, the buildings upper three floors are undergoing structural rehabilitation, along with full interior renovation throughout. The curb lane of Varick Street will remained occupied for the projects duration, and from approximately early May through September 2012 a crane will be used as necessary to lift materials into the building. Contractor Foundations Group is managing the project, which began in early 2012 and continues through early spring 2013.” UPDATE: See comment.

••• Terroir is among the new food (and wine) vendors on the High Line. —Eater

••• “Yesterday Bob Townley, executive director of Manhattan Youth—a community-based after-school services provider—was experiencing deja vu at City Hall. He and six middle school students from his after-school program at I.S. 289 in Battery Park City stood with hundreds of other youth services providers and children whose programs stand to be eliminated by Mayor Michael Bloomberg’s Preliminary Budget for Fiscal Year 2013. Mr. Townley, the I.S. 289 students, and many others had fought the same fight last year, but this year’s cuts go even deeper.” —Broadsheet

••• “The cost of renovating City Hall is going through the roof. More major structural problems have been discovered in the 200-year-old building that will drive up the cost of repairs and upgrades from $123.8 million to just under $150 million.” —New York Post

••• A jeweler picked up a hooker in Midtown who took him to the Cosmopolitan Hotel, allegedly drugged him, and stole $50,000 worth of uncut diamonds. At least he got laid before he got screwed. —New York Post

••• An ode to Poets House. —Wall Street Journal

••• The New Yorker reviews North End Grill: salad yes, eggs no. (See comments for link that works)

Courtesy Paris Review

••• The Paris Review visits the Tribeca studio of artist Terry Winters.

••• “This Thursday and Friday, Of a Kind will be setting up shop at 150 Varick Street for a sample sale ‘roadshow,’ which will feature nearly 30 designers and discounts of up to 80% off. [List of designers.] The sale will take place inside of Wieden+Kennedy’s showroom space, which had a sample sale of its own about a year ago [and will again this summer].” —Racked

••• “After seven years as [Community Board 1] chair, Julie Menin is barred by term-limit rules from running for re-election. [...] Two candidates are widely expected to run for the post: Catherine McVay-Hughes, CB1′s current vice chair, who also serves as chair of the World Trade Center Redevelopment Committee, and Paul Hovitz, who is co-chair of the Youth & Education Committee.” —Broadsheet

••• A New York Times article on how parents are hiring tutors for their kids—so they can get into middle school—includes Bright Kids NYC.

APRIL 12
From Atria Books: “What happens when you take four authors from three countries and put them on a bus to visit 12 cities in 8 days? Sounds almost like a literary reality show.” Or like the driver is going to die under suspicious circumstances…. “Atria’s Great Mystery Bus Tour will kick off on Thursday, April 12 at the Mysterious Bookshop on Warren Street in Tribeca at 6:30pm. Stop by and say hello to John Connolly, William Kent Krueger, Liza Marklund, and M.J Rose who will be talking about their books and signing copies.” Want to win a complete set of books by the authors appearing? Be one of the first five people to DM @paulieolsewski on Twitter.

APRIL 12–MAY 14
“Kevin McDermott: Portraits and Landscapes” at Steven Amedee Gallery. Left: Chad.

APRIL 13–JUNE 23
At Art in General: “In Rob Carter’s solo exhibition ‘Faith in A Seed,’ miniature replicas of three 19th Century estates—Charles Darwin’s Down House, Henry David Thoreau’s cabin at Walden, and Sir John Bennet Lawes’ Rothamsted Manor—will slowly disappear, overtaken by the gardens in which they reside. The transformation will occur over the course of the five-week exhibition.”

OPENING APRIL 19
At Frontrunner Gallery: “The ChiBeCa Project [by Leah Overstreet] is a portrait series documenting twenty residents, predominantly artists and small business owners, living and working on the edge of lower Manhattan. Framed by Chinatown to the east and Tribeca to the west, the neighborhood deserves its own name: ChiBeCa. For decades participants in the arts community have inhabited ChiBeCa, one of the few areas where one can still afford a studio. This unique pocket in Manhattan reflects intermingling cultures, dedicated artistic practice, and diverse definitions of ‘making it’ in New York City.”

APRIL 20–MAY 12
“Canal Park Playhouse is thrilled to present the New York premiere of Help! Help! I Know This Title Is Long But Somebody Is Trying to Kill Me, created by and featuring Drew Richardson, with direction by Avner the Eccentric: The performers of a vaudeville variety show have been murdered–except for Drew the Dramatic Fool! Unfortunately for him, the show must go on, or he’s next. Drew attempts every act in the show, from juggling 36 balls to sawing a woman in half, in this comical examination of fears–fear of performing, fear of failure, and fear of death.” There’s a related show on at the same time called Drew the Dramatic Fool.

MAY 1–JUNE 22
Two exhibits at RH Gallery. One is “‘On Air,’ the first New York solo exhibition by Soledad Arias. Arias’ text-based work explores the slippage of meanings in the aesthetic and literary reading of texts.” The other is a group show called “Text in Progress” and it includes Stephen Andrews, Joanne Cheung, Anne-Lise Coste, Jeff Elrod, León Ferrari, Joe Hardesty, Robert Kinmont, Stephanie Lempert, Micah Lexier, Ken Nicol and Qui Zhijie. This exhibition aims to explore text-based art practices which employ language to visually consider the process of conceptualizing ideas while also presenting a pictorial investigation of language itself.”

THROUGH MAY 5
At Pablo’s Birthday: “Artists Gero & Rees have developed a Tactical Play Exchange strategy to co-create a series of artworks over the past year. These works are forms that generally begin with contextual architectural elements derived from the site of exhibition, for example, the floor plan of the gallery, or other localized features. These become the core structures or null objects that will be added to, morphed and modified in multiple iterations using 3D modeling software and physical intervention. The digital files are passed back and forth between Gero & Rees creating a networked ‘ground of play’ that will extend itself, as adaptive potentiation, finally resulting in objects that are extensive transitive structures.”

MAY 8
Pen Parentis presents three authors who have won coveted prizes in short fiction: Josh Rolnick, whose collection Pulp and Paper won the John Simmons Short Fiction Award, Christine Schutt, whose short fiction won the O. Henry, Pushcart and Mississippi Review prizes, and whose novels have been shortlisted for the National Book Award and the Pulitzer, and a return appearance by Pen Parentis favorite Anna Solomon, whose short fiction has won the Pushcart Prize twice.

MAY 9
“Chutzpah Fest” (comedy) at the Museum of Jewish Heritage.

MAY 13
Food personalities Gail Simmons, Melissa Clark (love her writing in the NYT!), and Alan Richman will be at the Museum of Jewish Heritage to discuss “Jewish foods, home cooking, and the influence of their own mothers in forming their culinary memories.”

MAY 15–19
“Seats of Fancy” at RH Gallery: “The exhibition will feature unique and limited edition stools and chairs by Fredrik Färg, Harry and Camila Studio and Katrina Vonnegut, each made by the designers with unique processes. Färg’s stools from his ‘Succession’ series are constructed with leather, wrapped in rope and baked in the oven; Vonnegut hand-knits her unique chairs and ottomans while Harry and Camila Studio’s Dr. Bubbles on the Rocks is a sculptural chair cast in aluminum inspired by volcanoes.”

THROUGH MAY 22
“Canal Park Playhouse is thrilled to announce the extension of ‘House of Ghostly Haunts,’ the weekly Spook Show created and performed by Cardone the Magician. Ghostly, ghastly fun is haunting Canal Park Playhouse as vaudeville magician Cardone takes the stage on Tuesday nights. Guillotines are dropped, razors are swallowed, and spirits are conjured in a spellbinding celebration of the strange, macabre and the fantastical. While ‘House of Ghostly Haunts’ is family-friendly, no one under age 7 is permitted. The show ends in 10 minutes of complete darkness.”

MAY 24–NOVEMBER 30
“Common Ground,” an exhibit from the Public Art Fund at City Hall Park: “Traditional public monuments and statues had a clear civic purpose, many having been commissioned to commemorate an important event, notable individual, or significant group. The artists featured in this show—Elmgreen & Dragset, Ian Hamilton Finlay, Roger Hiorns, Jenny Holzer, Matthew Day Jackson, Justin Matherly, Paul McCarthy, Amalia Pica, and Thomas Schütte—have taken this tradition of civic sculpture and expanded upon it. Developing a new civic dialogue, the show explores the reappropriation of iconography from classical sculpture; engagement with themes of the individual and society; incorporation of language, symbolism, and metaphor; and the use of non-traditional materials and performance, among other themes.”

MAY 25
92YTribeca is screening Cabin Boy, including a Q&A with Chris Elliott and Adam Resnick.

JUNE 27–JULY 25
The Museum of Jewish Heritage is screening Mel Brooks films on Wednesday nights: Blazing Saddles, Young Frankenstein, Silent Movie, High Anxiety, History of the World Part I, and To Be or Not to Be.

JULY 17
Sam Moore is at City Winery.

JULY 26
Marshall Crenshaw is at City Winery.

••• From a press release: “Tamid: The Downtown Synagogue will open in the Fall 2012 with the mission to create Jewish opportunities for prayer, learning, and service for families, individuals and youth living in Lower Manhattan. Tamid will be led by three Reform rabbis, Darren Levine, Darcie Crystal, and Michael Mellen, all New York City residents and friends and colleagues dating back to rabbinical school in the late 1990’s. [...] For Shabbat and High Holy Days, Tamid will meet at St. Paul’s Chapel.”

••• Brite Buy Wines & Spirits has opened on Franklin between Church Franklin Place and Broadway. The new space is much roomier than the one on Sixth (which is being torn down). I should’ve taken a photo inside because this one didn’t really come out.

••• From Poets House: “Starting this Friday, April 6 and continuing until Tuesday, April 10, you can support Poets House by making a purchase at Barnes & Noble, Tribeca (97 Warren Street) or online at bn.com by providing the code 10734879 at checkout. A percentage of each purchase will benefit Poets House and will help support our general operations, ensuring that our 50,000-volume poetry library and literary center continues to thrive.” I always want to know what the percentage is, but I guess anything is net positive.