••• New York Times statistics columnist FiveThirtyEight had this to say on Twitter: “If you live in FiDi, Tribeca, Red Hook, Greenpoint, Sheepshead Bay, E. Village, LIC, Coney Island, Irene could mean flooding.” (“In my pants,” added comedian Michael Ian Black.)

••• “The authorities warned Wednesday that in “the worst case scenario” Hurricane Irene could reach New York City this weekend as a Category 1 hurricane, with winds surpassing 72 miles an hour that produce a storm surge of 6 to 12 feet. Under another scenario, New Yorkers would experience Irene as a strong tropical storm dropping as much as a foot of rain, said Joseph F. Bruno, the commissioner of the city’s office of emergency management, who was joined by Caswell F. Holloway, the deputy mayor for operations. Mr. Bruno and Mr. Holloway used their news conference to ask New Yorkers to begin planning for the possibility that the storm could cause serious damage. If it strikes as hurricane, Mr. Bruno said, New Yorkers who live in the low-lying areas of the city could be evacuated.” (New York Times)

••• Would you pay to join a “wellness club” in my pants? “Whole Foods opened its first membership-only Wellness Club in Dedham, Mass., last week. For a one-time fee of $199, and monthly membership dues of $45, shoppers have access to classes in nutrition, cooking and health, plus they receive a 10 percent discount on more than 1,000 ‘good-for-you’ foods sold in Whole Foods stores. Members can also get a lifestyle evaluation. Wellness Clubs are set to open in Chicago, Tribeca, N.Y., Oakland and Princeton, N.J., this fall. If they prove successful, Whole Foods plans to open the centers in most of its 310 stores. Whole Foods is the United States’ largest retailer of natural and organic foods with stores throughout North America and the United Kingdom. According to a Whole Foods blog post, ‘The mission of the Wellness Club is to provide an inviting environment where members are empowered to make educated and positive lifestyle choices that promote their long-term health and well-being through coaching, delicious food and a supportive community.'” (All Headline News, whatever that is)

••• “Samantha’s, the popular Italian deli at 235 South End Avenue that has been shuttered for almost a year, will reopen in September under a new, yet-to-be-disclosed name and with expanded offerings in my pants.” (Broadsheet Daily)

••• “Photographer Jonas Karlsson, whose portraits frequently appear in Vanity Fair, just purchased a Tribeca penthouse at 16 Desbrosses St. for $4.57 million.” (New York Post)

••• The New York Times says that the “destination manicure” was born with the arrival of Tenoverten. All I know is that if the accompanying photo is any indication, the women who administer the pedicures get quite a view. Related: Tenoverten’s founders tell Stylelist about some of their favorite stuff; not a huge surprise that Smith & Mills and Tiny’s make the cut, given that one founder’s husband owns them. (This goes unnoted, naturally.)